The Sh!t No One Tells You About Baby #2

The Sh!t No One Tells You About Baby #2
Author: Dawn Dais
Publisher: Seal Press
Total Pages: 209
Release: 2016-10-25
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 1580056326

The third book in Dawn Dais's popular Sh!t No One Tells You series covers all a parent needs to know once the reality of having two children settles in. Around the time your first baby turns a year old your brain will turn on you. For reasons that are still not understood by science, the sleep deprivation and postpartum hormones you barely survived with your first baby fade from memory and will be replaced with idyllic images of your growing child. This is when your brain, having officially lost all regard for your well-being, begins to fantasize about a second baby. And for the first time since becoming a parent these thoughts don't make you break out in hives. Before you know it, you are dressing your first child in "I'm Going to be a Big Sister!" T-shirts and catalog-shopping for bunk beds. This will be fantastic! But then that familiar morning sickness kicks in. And your adorable 18-month-old transforms into a two-year-old terror. That's when those hives start to return. With Dawn Dais's trademark witty banter, The Sh!t No One Tells You About Baby #2 includes chapters such as "You Have Officially Lost Control of the Situation," "Siblings Aren't Nearly as Adorable as You Imagined," "You'll Have a Favorite," and "Having Kids Looks a Lot Easier on TV."

No One Tells You This

No One Tells You This
Author: Glynnis MacNicol
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
Total Pages: 304
Release: 2018-07-10
Genre: Biography & Autobiography
ISBN: 1501163159

Featured in multiple “must-read” lists, No One Tells You This is “sharp, intimate…A funny, frank, and fearless memoir…and a refreshing view of the possibilities—and pitfalls—personal freedom can offer modern women” (Kirkus Reviews). If the story doesn’t end with marriage or a child, what then? This question plagued Glynnis MacNicol on the eve of her fortieth birthday. Despite a successful career as a writer, and an exciting life in New York City, Glynnis was constantly reminded she had neither of the things the world expected of a woman her age: a partner or a baby. She knew she was supposed to feel bad about this. After all, single women and those without children are often seen as objects of pity or indulgent spoiled creatures who think only of themselves. Glynnis refused to be cast into either of those roles, and yet the question remained: What now? There was no good blueprint for how to be a woman alone in the world. It was time to create one. Over the course of her fortieth year, which this ​“beguiling” (The Washington Post) memoir chronicles, Glynnis embarks on a revealing journey of self-discovery that continually contradicts everything she’d been led to expect. Through the trials of family illness and turmoil, and the thrills of far-flung travel and adventures with men, young and old (and sometimes wearing cowboy hats), she wrestles with her biggest hopes and fears about love, death, sex, friendship, and loneliness. In doing so, she discovers that holding the power to determine her own fate requires a resilience and courage that no one talks about, and is more rewarding than anyone imagines. “Amid the raft of motherhood memoirs out this summer, it’s refreshing to read a book unapologetically dedicated to the fulfillment of single life” (Vogue). No One Tells You This is an “honest” (Huffington Post) reckoning with modern womanhood and “a perfect balance between edgy and poignant” (People)—an exhilarating journey that will resonate with anyone determined to live by their own rules.

The Sh!t No One Tells You About Toddlers

The Sh!t No One Tells You About Toddlers
Author: Dawn Dais
Publisher: Seal Press
Total Pages: 241
Release: 2015-09-15
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 1580055907

They're getting bigger. And you're not getting any more sleep. Second in the Sh!t No One Tells You series, in The Sh!t No One Tells You About Toddlers Dawn Dais tells it like it is -- again -- offering real advice for parents of growing children. Coming from one empathetic parent to another, the tips in this book are real, clever, honest, and designed to make life with a terrible two- or three-year-old a little bit more manageable. Hilarious, helpful, and handy, this book will be appreciated by any parent who has asked: "Why didn't anybody warn me that unconditional love would be so much work?" Filled with tips, encouragement, and a strong dose of humor, The Sh!t No One Tells You About Toddlers is a survival handbook for parents on the edge.

The Sh!t No One Tells You About Pregnancy

The Sh!t No One Tells You About Pregnancy
Author: Dawn Dais
Publisher: Hachette UK
Total Pages: 256
Release: 2017-11-07
Genre: Health & Fitness
ISBN: 1580056342

The fourth book in Dawn Dais's popular Sh!t No One Tells You series offers "been there, freaked out about that" advice for expectant parents The fourth title in Dawn Dais's popular parenting series, The Sh!t No One Tells You About Pregnancy is quite possibly the funniest, and most heartfelt, yet. After all, pregnancy is not all about scanning Pinterest for baby shower themes and registering for ironic onesies, and sometimes the less flattering aspects of gestation have a way of dimming a bit of that so-called pregnancy glow. Not to worry! Dawn is here, ready to shepherd you through the experience of one human body taking on the task of growing another human body. (Spoiler alert: It ain't always pretty.) Dawn covers it all, sharing expert lists, tips, warnings, and even a series of Parent-Training Workouts designed to increase readers' tolerance to the various indignities of parenthood, like peeing with an audience and surviving an afternoon in Chuck E. Cheese. The Sh!t No One Tells You About Pregnancy is a must-have guide for expectant moms (and their partners!) who are looking for some counsel, comedy, and camaraderie during their ultimate countdown to parenthood.

The Pied Piper of Hamelin

The Pied Piper of Hamelin
Author: Russell Brand
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
Total Pages: 128
Release: 2014-11-11
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 1501107275

With this first book in Russell Brand’s Trickster Tales series, the famed comedian, actor, and bestselling author delivers a hilarious retelling of an old fairytale favorite that will appeal to adults and children alike. Once upon a time, long ago, in a time that seemed, to those present, exactly like now except their teeth weren’t so clean and more things were wooden, there was a town called Hamelin. The people of Hamelin were a pompous bunch who loved themselves and their town so much that if it were possible they would have spent all day zipped up in a space suit smelling their own farts. But space suits hadn’t been invented yet so they couldn’t. Then one day without warning a gang of rats bowled into the town and began causing a right rumpus… So begins Russell Brand’s wildly funny and surprisingly wise retelling of the classic tale The Pied Piper of Hamelin. Whether you’re a kid or a grown-up kid, you’ll be chuckling the whole way through this zany story that bypasses Brand’s more adult humor for the outrageous, the madcap, and the just plain silly. Maybe you’ve heard about the Pied Piper before, with his strange music and those pompous townspeople and pesky rats. Or maybe you haven’t. But one thing is for sure: you’ve never heard it quite like this.

If I Ran the Zoo

If I Ran the Zoo
Author: Dr. Seuss
Publisher: Random House Books for Young Readers
Total Pages: 63
Release: 1950
Genre: Juvenile Nonfiction
ISBN: 0394800818

Gerald tells of the very unusual animals he would add to the zoo, if he were in charge.

Long Shot

Long Shot
Author: Chris Paul
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
Total Pages: 34
Release: 2030-12-31
Genre: Juvenile Fiction
ISBN: 1416958207

A Simon & Schuster eBook. Simon & Schuster has a great book for every reader.

What If Everybody Did That?

What If Everybody Did That?
Author: Ellen Javernick
Publisher: Marshall Cavendish
Total Pages: 40
Release: 2010
Genre: Juvenile Fiction
ISBN: 9780761456865

"Text first published in 1990 by Children's Press, Inc."

Things Not Seen

Things Not Seen
Author: Andrew Clements
Publisher: Penguin
Total Pages: 280
Release: 2006-04-20
Genre: Juvenile Fiction
ISBN: 1101200456

Winner of American Library Association Schneider Family Book Award! Bobby Phillips is an average fifteen-year-old-boy. Until the morning he wakes up and can't see himself in the mirror. Not blind, not dreaming-Bobby is just plain invisible. There doesn't seem to be any rhyme or reason to Bobby's new condition; even his dad the physicist can't figure it out. For Bobby that means no school, no friends, no life. He's a missing person. Then he meets Alicia. She's blind, and Bobby can't resist talking to her, trusting her. But people are starting to wonder where Bobby is. Bobby knows that his invisibility could have dangerous consequences for his family and that time is running out. He has to find out how to be seen again-before it's too late.