This is me, this is my story of abuse in the home and how the trauma has impacted my young and adult life. It may not always be easy reading but I believe that, in the end, it is a story about healing and hope. I write about the most intense and horrendous part of my recovery from the many years of sexual and violent abuse I suffered in my childhood, from two family members. For many years I could not look at, or even acknowledge those buried memories, choosing instead to soothe myself with food, alcohol, drugs etc. When I could no longer ignore my trauma and began to feel its full effect, I wanted to take my own life. I wrote the book for my two sons as at this time. I realised if I did not survive they would never know the true story behind my ending. I wanted to acknowledge that just because I am now a specialist worker in Domestic Abuse I have not been immune to living with the trauma of the past, I am also human like any other woman and have a story like many victims of violence. Recovery is not forgetting it happened or shutting it out, it is being brave, being vulnerable and being heard. I hope my story will encourage others to believe that we can heal, we can find our voice. I am the living proof that you can. I hope this book will resonate with other survivors or family member's who have been directly or indirectly impacted by abuse. You are the expert on your own life no one else.Be kind x